Tuesday, February 7, 2012

The Month is Up

So, I don't think I explained this very well, so I am going to do a post on what we have decided as far as DD is concerned in our relationship.

When we started doing DD again, I agreed to trying it for a month (until the end of January) and then we would sit and talk about the past month if there was anything we/ I wanted to change about DD, if I even wanted to continue doing it etc. So during that month we had agreed on all of the "rules" before hand. I put rules in quotations because we didn't write any of them down and most of them I knew already were just things he was totally not cool with. So I had agreed to these rules:

1. No saying whatever
2. No swearing
3. No reading blogs, writing on my blog, or going on the LDD network
4. No hitting his face

They are only four rules, and they were the only ones he implemented, he did not spank me for anything else. Incidentally I broke all of them, but that is besides the point hehe. Now let me explain each of them a little and why they were the ones that were chosen for our first month back at this.

1. This is a problem I have had for as long as I can remember, and Ken hates it...like a lot. So it was an obvious one he didn't even need to tell me that it was a no no. Its disrespectful and I totally get why I can't say it an I agree with it being a rule.

2. This has not always been a problem, and it rarely is. But I suggested this rule a long time ago because I think it is so unattractive and I don't want to swear and his motivation helps a lot.

3. Now this one is a little bit more complicated. Ken explained to me that when I was reading blogs to him, or he was reading blogs, that he felt pressured and highly influenced to do ttwd the way that others were doing it. He also felt that I expected it that way (I was not aware of this, nor did I realize that I may have made that impression). I would never make Ken feel inadequate on purpose, and I did not realize that my reading blogs to him and talking to him about them was affecting him this way. So when he asked that I not read blogs I gladly agreed ( not really thinking about it ). So thus the awful rule was made and it was in stone, for the moth at least.

4. Okay, I am not abusive or anything just when we are joking around and being silly I might slap him a little...and he doesn't like it do I am not to do it. Pretty fair, I agree to this as well...I still do it often because I know this is the only rule he is really lenient with and he will give me super fair notice when he is really getting sick of it and to check myself.

So those where the rules for the month...and the only rules. There were no spankings for being rude, or disrespectful or disobedience spankings. I know it doesn't sound like DD at all now that I am saying it. But I was really upset and I needed to feel like I could try this again before we jumped back into it. So if you haven't noticed the grand theme of the above rules is that I agreed to them all.

Now that the month is up things are changing, and I have agreed to one thing only....that I am in this for another month. He is now making all the rules and I will be following them (or breaking them) whether I like it or not. I have asked that he writes them down for me this time though, and I haven't seen them as of yet, and I also haven't decided whether or not I am going to post them when he does. I do know however that I am allowed to blog. Also I am allowed to read other blogs (on the condition that he doesn't feel like I am pressuring him to change the way he conducts ttwd) and I WILL be allowed back on the LDD network at some point....although I do not know when, because not being allowed is part of my punishment for not obeying the rule number three in the last month.

So that is the deal with us, and that is also why there hasn't been very many punishment posts...because there really hasn't been that many punishments.

Also, I would like to thank everyone who is still reading our blog and to those of you who have commented and e-mailed me I am especially grateful, I really have been missing talking to people that know about this part of my life and you have reminded me that you are still there and that means a lot.

Tata for now,

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